Being a Step parent in the modern world.

As you may or may not know, I am the stepmom to 3 beautiful children. So many times I see children who are pushed aside by their step parents or are treated as less than equal to the biological children of that step parent. I wish I could teach those parents to see the beauty of loving that child as if he or she were their own. I may not have given birth to my three stepchildren, but I am like a mother bear with her cubs with them anyway. Another thing that is hard with being a stepmother is knowing when to back down. You must understand that there is another person who should be first in your stepchild's life and that is the mother/father. The way we handle this is we are very open in communication with the mother/father. If sewing is something that the children have never done then I call to ask if it's okay to do with the kids. It is very vital to never say anything demeaning about the other parent. Nobody is going to agree 100% of the time. Yet these are our precious children we are raising and it's so important not to put them in a difficult position. So now I would like to open up the floor and hear any comments from other parents or stepparents.